Nobody Can Drive You Crazy Unless You Give Them the Keys

At almost every one of my speaking events, I try to include the topic of environment whenever possible. Some would probably question why I would do that when I am primarily talking to real estate professionals, salespeople and entrepreneurs, but I always wonder why it is not discussed more.

A few years ago, a study was conducted to try and find common denominators among the top 100 salespeople in the world. They were expecting to get results like customer service, systems or drive. These are definitely important but do you know what the number one common trait was for the top 100 salespeople in the world? It was “the ability to manage or ability to control one’s state of mind.”

Anyone who has attended one of my speaking events knows that I could talk about “state of mind” all day long, so I found this common denominator among the top 100 salespeople extremely interesting. When was the last time that you saw a breakout session or keynote dedicated to this topic at your company’s or state’s convention? (Cue the cricket’s sound in the background.)

So how do you do this? Let’s get practical about it. Scenario #1 – Let’s say that you went to a closing representing the seller. At the closing your sellers decides that they are going to back out of the deal because they don’t like what the buyer is wearing that day. I would imagine that you would be pretty ticked off about this. While you are in this ticked off state, imagine that you receive a phone call from another one of your clients…

Scenario #2 – You are now at a closing where you represent the sellers and they decide at the closing that you have done such an amazing job that they are doubling your commission owed. You leave that closing in a jubilant state and receive the exact same phone call as scenario #1, only this time you are overjoyed and happy.

Here is the question… would you agree that given the two scenarios above the caller would experience two completely different sides of your personality based on the state of mind you were in when they called? Of course they would! For client #1 you would have been ticked off, but for client #2 you were in a place where everything was right with the world.

The challenge with this is being able to achieve that #1 common denominator among the top 100 sales people in the world—the ability to control or manage your own state of mind. It means that every client should get the EXACT same version of YOU. Is it easy to do? Of course not! But success doesn’t always come from what is the easiest thing to do. It takes work and dedication.

Remember this – nobody can drive you crazy unless you give them the keys to do so. You are in control of your state of mind. Your success will be determined by just how true that statement is in your life.

Jared James is the CEO and Fsounder of Jared James Enterprises, an internationally sought-after speaker and trainer. James built one of the fastest-growing real estate teams in the country, was inducted into the International Hall of Fame for one of the world’s largest real estate companies and wrote a best-selling book—all before the age of 28. As an acclaimed speaker, James keynotes events for major real estate organizations and conducts regular webinars and training for nationally known organizations like NAR, CRS, Yahoo Real Estate, Trulia and Zillow Academy and blogs regularly for RISMedia.